[Intro: Upchurch as Big Lil GobbStoppa]
It's your boy Dagburn (Dagburn) ...ururururn

[Verse 1: Upchurch as Big Lil GobbStoppa]
I just wanna tickle-fight with the mayor
Pigs in a blanket is my favorite flavor
I said I wasn't 'bout tryin', even had a waiver
I guess I'm too soft, like a Nilla wafer

[Verse 2: Upchurch as Big Lil GobbStoppa]
Got Redneck Nation as my screensaver
I'm editin' my videos on a Acer
Yeah, Ryan Upchurch, ain't nobody faker
He's callin' me a pussy while he's playin' with a laser

[Bridge]
And I'm bein' serious, y'all, I ain't chasin' 'round this red dot no more, aight?
I got charges to file, a whole bunch of them (It's John Holbrook's fault)

[Chorus: Upchurch as Big Lil GobbStoppa]
It ain't fair, I wanna tickle-fight the mayor
Sneak into his house, record it with a tape player
It ain't fair, I wanna tickle-fight the mayor
I filed so many charges, I need plenty more paper
I want to tickle-fight the mayor (I'm gon' get you mayor), the mayor
[Verse 3: Upchurch as Big Lil GobbStoppa]
Derkie White is my best friend
He lives in West Virginia on a dead end
We talk over each other when we pretend
We got all the proof, y'all, you just don't... you just don't understand

[Bridge: Upchurch as Big Lil GobbStoppa]
Derkie showed me lots of ninja moves
And some Polaroids of some boobs
And I always only tell the truth
Now the turkey's in the chicken coop
I'm the shit, Amber Heard's poop
Pirate of the butts, maybe true
Ain't a person that I won't sue
Wish Church was covered in barbeque

[Bridge]
And the mayor, I won't forget you either (I'll never forget the mayor)
I seen you at the Piggly Wiggly yesterday, Mayor (It's John Holbrook's fault)

[Chorus: Upchurch as Big Lil GobbStoppa]
It ain't fair, I wanna tickle-fight the mayor
Sneak into his house, record it with a tape player
It ain't fair, I wanna tickle-fight the mayor
I filed so many charges, I need plenty more paper
I want to tickle-fight the mayor, the mayor
[Outro: Upchurch as Big Lil GobbStoppa]
Dagburn
Dagburn
I just wanna tickle-fight with the mayor
Sneak into his house, tape player
Ain't fair, tickle-fight the mayor
File so many charges but nobody cares
Ain't fair (It ain't)
Paintsville's fault (Everybody already knows that though)