[Pat Wilson]
I call this session to order with the drums of freedom!

[Brian Bell]
I second your motion with the guitar of liberty!

[Scott Shriner]
Not to be outdone, I administer the bassline of justice!

[Rivers Cuomo]
I am pointing to the emu of elf excretion

[Brian Bell]
Will the gentleman rise to sing a plaintive melody?

[Charles Rangel]
Don't leave me swinging in the wind until November
I am here! I am not going away!
Hey, if I was you, I may want me to go away, too
You know, what the hell, do what you have to do
But don't leave me swinging in the wind
Until November, until November
Don't leave me swinging in the wind, the wind
Democrats, hey! And Republicans, hey!
As much as I love you, I am not going away
I violated the rules and I'm apologizing
For God's sake, I'm 80 years old and all I'm saying is
Heck, have the ethics committee expedite this
This is an emergency
Democrats, hey! And Republicans, hey!
As much as I love you, I am not going away
[Congressional Choir]
He's still a contender, he will not surrender
Don't you leave him swinging in the wind until November

[Rivers Cuomo]
Don't leave me swinging in the wind
Until November, until November
Don't leave me swinging in the wind

[Charles Rangel]
Do what you have to do
But don't leave me swinging in the wind
Until November, until November
Don't leave me swinging in the wind, the wind

[Congressional Choir]
Dance Break!

[Anthony Weiner]
The gentleman will sit!

[Congressional Choir]
Yes!

[Anthony Weiner]
Instead of standing up!
[Congressional Choir]
No!

[Anthony Weiner]
The gentleman will sit!

[Congressional Choir]
Let's go!

[Anthony Weiner]
The gentleman is correct in sitting!

[Congressional Choir]
Hold that seat!

[Anthony Weiner]
The gentleman will observe regular order and sit down!

[Congressional Choir]
Left! Right!

[Anthony Weiner]
Down!

[Congressional Choir]
Up!
[Anthony Weiner]
Down!

[Congressional Choir]
And spin around!

[Sanjay Gupta]
There's a lot of pain and anguish
From people worried about this Islamic Center

[Ron Paul]
What about these strip joints, strip joints, strip joints?
Are these people who are holier than thou
Condemning the strip joints nearby?

[Sanjay Gupta]
Alright, fair enough (Yeah!)
Fair enough

[Ethan Gregory]
Let's take a closer look at the strippers
To see if they got something to hide
Oh yeah!

[Ron Paul]
Painting Islam with a broad brush
Makes our problems worse, worse, worse
Makes them worse (Oh yeah!)
And I don't like it
Nobody should like it, like it
Painting strip joints with a broad brush
Makes our problems worse (Worse)
Worse (Worse), worse (Much worse!)
It was done to the Jews before
That's why we have perpetual war

[Ethan Gregory]
Blood and gore

[Ron Paul]
Perpetual war

[Ethan Gregory]
Forevermore

[Ron Paul]
Perpetual war

[Ethan Gregory]
Persecutin' Islamic strippers

[Ron Paul]
I don't like it

[Ethan Gregory]
Puttin' a ban on Halal liquor

[Ron Paul]
Nobody should like it

[Ethan Gregory]
Burnin' Qur'ans to get people pissed

[Ron Paul]
I don't like it

[Ethan Gregory]
Puttin' Tinky Winky on the no-fly list

[Ron Paul]
Nobody should like it

[Barack Obama]
Republicans drove our economy into a ditch
We got in there and we pushed and we shoved
And these guys were standin', sippin' on a Slurpee
And then they got the nerve to ask for the keys back
I don't wanna give em the keys back
They don't know how to drive, don't know how to drive
When you wanna go forward in your car, what do you do?
You put it in 'D', they're gonna pop it in reverse
I don't wanna give em the keys back
They don't know how to drive, don't know how to drive

[Gregory Brothers]
Our metaphorical car got no brakes and no gearshift
We'll go metaphorically far while we're

[Barack Obama & Gregory Brothers]
Standin' in the ditch
Bitch!

[Outro]
AutoTune the News (AutoTune the News)
AutoTune the News (AutoTune the News)
Everything sounds better AutoTuned