[Intro:]
Oh man, im tired!
And a long yet productive day at the studio today
Feeling little good about myself
Just gonna check my facebook and see if I got any messages from old friends of mine
Maybe brag a little bit, Y'know what I mean?
[Verse 1:]
I just updated my status
It says, "Big Wax is the motherfuckin' baddest"
And along comes Katie, from Missouri
Hits the 'Like' button in a hurry
Two minutes later got a worry cause I check my messages
And my girl wants to know who this bitch I had sex with is
I say, "Who?". Up comes the chat box
"Katie." Caps Lock
I typed back, "Girl it ain't like that."
Katie is the girlfriend of my boy Mike that I know from a Psych Lab, he's a college buddy
She typed, "O-M-G. I'm not a dummy."
Her status says 'Single' on the wall
Is that the girl you fucked on tour last fall
So I hit the X, then I get a text, then I get a call
Then I get a tweet at @BigWax "Fuck Y'all"
I hope you and Katie both die
Here's an e-kite you should both go fly
I should've just deleted my page
Fuck that, now I'mma need it to get laid
[Hook:]
Don't be postin' nothin' up on my wall
Stay off my facebook
Stay offa my facebook
And don't be tagging me in nothin' at all
Stay off my facebook
Get up offa my facebook
And now my girlfriend wants to chop of my balls
Stay off my facebook
Stay offa my facebook
It just makes it oh so easy to stalk
Stay off my facebook
Bitch, get off my facebook
[Verse 2:]
Check it out
Yo, drunk pictures, fun at the show
Not cool to everyone that you know
I just had a job interview, it would've been a a great look
Interviewer called me and said he saw my Facebook
He said I ain't gettin' the position
Due to the picture of me nekkid in my kitchen
With a bong in my hand that I just got tagged in
All my friends makin' up their own fake captions
One read, "That's Mike to a T."
And that was the one that was typed by me
Whatever happened to privacy?
My mom got a page just to spy on me
When she first friended me, I fuckin' hated it
Cause she thinks everything's some drug-related shit
What are those little smiley faces for?
Damn It! I should've just hit ignore
Yeah, I'm about to bite the bullet
Delete my page, yeah, tonight I'm gonna do it
Make a fake page with a wrong name and just use it to stalk my ex and play that farm game
[Hook:]
[Outro:]
Once and for all, I just want all you motherfuckers to stay off my facebook page
In fact, I'm gonna delete it and make a new one
I'll pick a name of somebody really cool
And have a picture with some dude with chiseled abs
Takin' a picture in front of the mirror
Say I'm from a cool place
Maybe, I'll be from, uh, Anchorage, Alaska, or some shit...