[Verse 1: Puff Puff Humbert & Cartoon Wax]
‎‎‎‏‏‎And we're back, back to the disco
Back to the music, back to the flashing lights! (We're here!)
Went straight to the bar like
"Ayy, let me get a round of Orphan Tears on ice!"
I only took one sip, and it's kickin' in
I said, "Hey, Wax, can you help me?" (Nah.)
"It's kinda funny everybody calls you Wax
'Cause everything is melting."
My left hand turned to Scooby-Doo (Zoinks!)
I got chased around by a Gucci shoe!
I heard an explosion behind me
I didn't look back, like the people in the movies do!
I saw a gang of tiny He-Men
I prayed to Morgan Freeman
It's snowin', now I'm glowin'
Orphan Tears, man, I must be dreamin'

[Chorus: Stevi The Demon, Puff Puff Humbert]
Little, children near and far
Don't know where your parents are
Cry, directly in this jar!
I will drink it at the bar, cool
Sip-sippin' on Orphan Tears
Sip-sip-sippin' on Orphan Tears
Sip-sippin' on, sip-sip-sippin' on
Er-ey-er-ey, sippin' on Orphan Tears!
Sip-sippin' on Orphan Tears
Sip-sip-sippin' on Orphan Tears
Sip-sippin' on, sip-sip-sippin' on
Er-ey-er-ey, sippin' on Orphan Tears
[Verse 2: Cartoon Wax]
One shot, two shot, three shots, four of 'em
Into my body go the tears of an orphan
My brain releases endorphins!
Look around, and everything started morphin'!
What I thought was a cocktail waitress
Became a yellow aardvark with braces (Hi!)
We followed her into a far away place
In which it was dark and there were dozens of cages
Little cartoon pigs inside 'em
I was laughin', takin' pictures by 'em
Look closer, the pigs were cryin'?
What in God's name is this signifyin'?
In a daze, all of us were lost
Hours passed and the drugs wore off
Wait, we're in a warehouse building
Those aren't pigs, those are actually little children?

[Chorus: Stevi The Demon, Puff Puff Humbert]
Little children near and far
Don't know where your parents are
Cry directly in this jar
I will drink it at the bar, cool
Sip-sippin' on Orphan Tears
Sip-sip-sippin' on Orphan Tears
Sip-sippin' on, sip-sip-sippin' on
Er-ey-er-ey, sippin' on Orphan Tears
Sip-sippin' on Orphan Tears
Sip-sip-sippin' on Orphan Tears
Sip-sippin' on, sip-sip-sippin' on
Er-ey-er-ey, sippin' on Orphan Tears
[Verse 3: Puff Puff Humbert, Bill Cosby]
We had found a bunch of kids workin' in a sweatshop
And they would cry into mason jars and bottle it up
We gotta help 'em out of here, I'm not an engineer
But I think these Orphan Tears are made from actual orphan's tears!
Suddenly Bill Cosby appeared in the doorway right behind me (Hello)
He was ten feet tall in a top hat
Ready to fight me in his whitey-tighties!
Pretty sure Bill's in charge of the place
'Cause he swolled up, lookin' like a grizzly bear
That bloodsucker looked us dead in the face
"These children aren't going anywhere!"
(Rahh!)