Zoan
Ominous Feelings
Became a legend
But the reception ain’t so pleasant
Got jealous cats on the block
Accusing and saying, “Kevin
You don’t deserve that spot”
And their temper’s real hot
Maybe if I had a pot to piss in
I wouldn’t be smoking up so much of the pot
Wary of going anywhere
Cause it means running into
Suspect, and ill-willed foos in the parking lot
Became a hero
But the imposter syndrome is becoming quite lethal
Doubt telling me, “You made all that money”
But didn’t bring anyone to accept Christ
You living your best life
But your day ones and closest homeboys
Be crying themselves to sleep every single night
Gotta pick and choose which battles to fight
And I worry that I won’t be able to let down my pride

It’s scary… some people don’t want to operate and move with love… hate, anger, spite, jealousy dictates how they live… I got peace… but some people in this world don’t have that… and when they see cats like me be in abundance of good and holy things… they want to rob that from me… they want to drag me to their level of misery and hopelessness… See the thing is… I love God… but there are some people that hate God… they hate the concept of God… they don’t view God as loving and kind… and if they view God in that way… imagine how they view the world… and the fact that these exact same people feel a type of way towards me being who I am… you know they gonna come with disrespect and hate… and that don’t feel too good man..

Got my reward
No longer want to draw the sword
Sometimes I struggle with the fact
That if I’m not problematic
My fans are gonna be dissatisfied, angsty, and bored
The world wants more
And I can certainly deliver
Sometimes I fail to understand
Shredder has mad hatred for the ninja turtles
And especially towards Master Splinter
I’ll be mad sad if Lizzy finds someone else to cuddle up with during the winter
In the game, there are losers
And the losers always feel a type of way
Which sometimes sucks the joy out of me being the winner
God is the giver
And he gave so much to me
But that happening
Is what makes me actually
A target for others
Is somewhat upsetting
And what be bugging me
The thing is… I’m finally making it… and my fear is when I do make it… I’m gonna be surrounded by people who only want to be around me for the perks and benefit… that all I attract are those who want something from me instead of people who just enjoy being around me… and that from this point on forward, none of my relationships are genuine… that most of them will be predicated on… “You can do a lot for me… so Ima ride with you.”… that I’ll be someone noteworthy… but can’t find real genuine love… what’s the point of making a lot of money… and having people know your name… but feel like you can’t even trust, rely, and depend on those around you… That’s a sad life… and one that I feel could be very real for me… and that don’t feel too good man…