[Verse 1: Andy Samberg]
I don't know why, but today seems like it's gonna be a great day
There's something in the air that makes me feel like thing are gonna go my way
The birds are chirping "tweet-aly deet", the sun is shining bright
There's a skip in my step, a pep in my pep, and I don't know why

[Interlude 1: Andy Samberg & Bobby Moynihan]
Hey there, mailman Fred, any letters from my ex-wife or the kids?
No
Fantastic news! Hahahahaha

[Verse 2: Andy Samberg]
Wonderful day makes me feel so happy that my face is numb
My heart is racing along, "ba-ra-pa-papapa-pahm"
So many people and places to meet, now that I lost my job
They say, "Young man, the world's your oyster–"

[Interlude 2: Andy Samberg]
Hey! Hey! Get the fuck off me! No! Fuck no!
Just give me a second (*snorting*)

[Verse 3: Andy Samberg]
I don't know why, but today seems like it's gonna be a great day
La la la, blah blah blah I should spend more time with my kids
It's carpe diem, gotta seize the day
Gonna move to Spain and run with the bulls
And my wife and boss and kids and parents will say
"We were wrong about you, Dennis."
[Interlude 3: Andy Samberg, Jorma Taccone]
Hey, Dennis!
That's my name
Are you really gonna run with the bulls?
Why would I do that?
Because you said you were gonna
Come on man, that was like three days ago
Or was it?

[Verse 4: Andy Samberg]
Something today makes me feel fine and fancy-free
Much of the ocean is still unexplored, how did I get up in this tree?
Now I'm over here, now I'm over there
Now I'm under this dude, now I'm back in this tree
Now I'm hanging out backstage
With my very best friends, Alec Baldwin and Tom Petty

[Interlude 4: Andy Samberg, Alec Baldwin, Tom Petty]
Get the fuck out of here
What?
Now
Tom?

[Bridge: Andy Samberg]
Why would they diss me? I thought they were my homies!
(*snorting*)
[Verse 5: Andy Samberg]
Any problem is solvable
We can feed the hungry and cure disease
But all of that would be a huge waste of time
Because we live in the Matrix

[Outro Skit: Nasim Pedrad & Bill Hader]
What is wrong with him?
He's on drugs
Oh