[Intro: Bowen Yang, Anya Taylor-Joy, Kate McKinnon, Punkie Johnson]
Hey, all you shes, gays, and nays. It's the month of almost June
And you know what that means!
Pride is around the corner!
But last year, Pride didn't happen, so now, we're making up for lost time

[Song: Bowen Yang, Anya Taylor-Joy, all]
Pride is a celebration, yeah, that's what it's about
Last year, we couldn't meet up, but this time it's allowed
With my queer friends and allies, now it's time to go out
Ooh, ooh, we get to do it all again

Now we're out on the floor, but I don't see my crush
He's not texting me back, well, I'll just brush it off
Have a mental breakdown, make my friends take care of me
And I think wooo! Yeah, yeah, yeah!

[Chorus: Bowen Yang, Anya Taylor-Joy, all]
It's Pride again!
We've been waiting so long
It's Pride again!
For so much to go wrong
It's Pride again!
Santa comes, but for queers
This is our Saint Paddy's Day
Acting sloppy 'cause we're gay
[Spoken: Anya Taylor-Joy, Bowen Yang]
Who cares about him? You're so cool and so funny!
I don't wanna be funny! I wanna be hot!

[Verse: Kate McKinnon, Anya Taylor-Joy]
It's our first Pride together
And it's also our last
'Cause even for lesbians
We moved in way too fast
But we're still hosting a gay brunch
And frying eggs got us hot
Ooh, ooh, tonight we'll break up again

[Verse: Bowen Yang, Punkie Johnson, all]
You go flirt with that girl?
Man, I tried, but she's straight
Well then, how 'bout her friend?
She is also a straight
When did all these straight girls
Start dressing lesbian?
And we go woooo! Yeah, yeah, yeah!

[Chorus: Bowen Yang, Kate McKinnon, all]
It's Pride again!
It's inclusive and it's great!
It's Pride again!
But who let in all these straights?
It's Pride again!
Gender is just clothes
Let's go eat some Chick Fil-A
Nothing matters anyway
[Spoken: Bowen Yang, Anya Taylor-Joy, Kate McKinnon, Punkie Johnson]
Wait, we're not eating Chick Fil-A. They're homophobic!
Okay, no. That is such a neoliberal notion to equate individual responsibility with collectivist politics
Terence, don't talk like you read theory. You don't read theory
I read theory, sis. Sis, I read theory!
What theory do you read?
Podcasts?
Terence, that is not theory!
Well, you work at Georgia Bank! You Georgia Bank bitch!
Oh God, I miss this

[Bridge: Lil Nas X]
Time for the parade, y'all. Let's get messy!
You'd hate the drama on any other night
But during Gay Pride, this is doing gay right
Post hole on close friends, post hole on main
Post hole for the countries where you can't be gay
Marsha P. Johnson and Harvey Milk
They paved the way for you to shake your filth
Stonewall was a kiki when they threw the brick
They fought for your right to be this chaotic

[Chorus: Lil Nas X, Anya Taylor-Joy, Bowen Yang, all]
Yeah, yeah, yeah! It's Pride again!
We're so sunburnt and mad
And we love it!
Fifty-dollar drinks that are bad
How we missed it!
I'm overwhelmed, but I love
We're just happy that we're queer
And can do this every year
[Outro: Bowen Yang, all]
Wait, are we on a Deutsche Bank float?
This sucks
It's Pride again!