[Verse 1]
Well, I’m stranded in the city that never sleeps
Some of these women they just give me the creeps
I’m avoidin’ the Southside the best I can
These memories I got, they can strangle a man

[Verse 2]
Well I came ashore in the dead of the night
Lot of things can get in the way when you’re tryin’ to do what’s right
You don’t understand it—my feelings for you
You’d be honest with me if only you knew

[Verse 3]
I’m not sorry for nothin’ I’ve done
I’m glad I fought—I only wish we’d won
The Siamese twins are comin’ to town
People can’t wait—they’re gathered around

[Verse 4]
When I left my home the sky split open wide
I never wanted to go back there—I’d rather have died
You don’t understand it—my feelings for you
You’d be honest with me if only you knew

[Verse 5]
My woman got a face like a teddy bear
She’s tossin’ a baseball bat in the air
The meat is so tough you can’t cut it with a sword
I’m crashin’ my car, trunk first into the boards
[Verse 6]
You say my eyes are pretty and my smile is nice
Well, I’ll sell it to ya at a reduced price
You don’t understand it—my feelings for you
You’d be honest with me, if only you knew

[Verse 7]
Some things are too terrible to be true
I won’t come here no more if it bothers you
The Southern Pacific leaving me at nine forty-five
I’m having a hard time believin’ some people were ever alive

[Verse 8]
I’m stark naked, but I don’t care
I’m going off into the woods, I’m huntin’ bare
You don’t understand it—my feelings for you
Well, you’d be honest with me if only you knew

[Verse 9]
I’m here to create the new imperial empire
I’m going to do whatever circumstances require
I care so much for you—didn’t think that I could
I can’t tell my heart that you’re no good

[Verse 10]
Well, my parents they warned me not to waste my years
And I still got their advice oozing out of my ears
You don’t understand it—my feelings for you
Well, you’d be honest with me if only you knew