Spoken by Pickles:
What's up it's Pickles, leave a message
Spoken by Ms. Matronic:
Hey, I'm calling you back
Ooh, she's been a bitch tonight
And by bitch I mean this rain
No cab, nowhere
So I had to put on the wigs, and the heels
And the lashes and the eairh
And take the train to the club

And you know the MTA should stand for "motherfuckers touching my ass"
So then I get to the club
Looking like a drowned harassed rat
And am greeted not by Miss Rose at the door
But our friend, Johnny 5-0
Yes honey, the NYPD shut down the party!

So no fee for me
I don't even know what's the tea!
So I hope you're up, girl
'Cause we are all coming over
Lock the doors, lower the blinds
Fire up the smoke machine
And put on your heels
'Cause I know exactly what we need!
Sung:
Let’s have a kiki
I wanna have a kiki
Lock the doors tight!
Let’s have a kiki
Motherfucker
I’m gonna let you have it
Let’s have a kiki
I wanna have a kiki
Dive turn work
Let’s have a kiki
We’re gonna serve and work and turn honey

A kiki is a party for calming all your nerves
We’re spilling tea and dishing just desserts
One may deserve
And though the sun is rising few may choose to leave
So shade that lid and we’ll all bid adieu to
Your ennui
Kiki! Soso! Oui Oui! Non Non!

Let’s have a kiki
I wanna have a kiki
Lock the doors tight!
Let’s have a kiki
Motherfucker
I’m gonna let you have it
Let’s have a kiki
I wanna have a kiki
Dive turn work
Let’s have a kiki
We’re gonna serve and work and turn honey
Oh what a wonderful Kiki
This kiki is marvellous

Kiki! Soso! Oui Oui! Non Non!
Kiki! Soso! Oui Oui! Non Non!
Kiki! Soso! Oui Oui! Non Non!

Let’s have a kiki
I wanna have a kiki
Lock the doors tight!
Let’s have a kiki
Motherfucker
I’m gonna let you have it
Let’s have a kiki
I wanna have a kiki
Dive turn work
Let’s have a kiki
We’re gonna serve and work and turn honey

Let’s have a kiki
I wanna have a kiki
Lock the doors tight!
Let’s have a kiki
Hunty dropper
I’m gonna let you have it
Let’s have a kiki
I wanna have a kiki
Boots Ten Queen
Let’s have a kiki
We’re gonna serve and work and turn honey