[Round 1: Carter Deems]
No joke, I brought no jokes
I'm throwing nothing but missiles dude
Pssssttp boooom...that's what a missile do
I'm balling out, tossing bricks, but it's getting to my head, that's what a miss'll do
On the block, with that rock...I'm a little parched
Can someone get me a Sprite or a Fresco or even a Sierra Mist will do
Now back to what my missiles do
I change like the difference do when I drop a ten for a pack of gum that's only $1.22
Slow it down, I'm actually dissing you
I said I change into a different dude when I drop that tin, packing guns, I only need one .22
Bullets flying by like wizards do
They whizzing through
I name my gun "Isaac's Parents When He Goes To Summer Camp"...cause they not missing you
Crossbows, bow staffs and pistol's too
My gun get mad for ten hours, he's gonna be pissed 'til 2:00
For real, I don't even like you a little dude
You're just a little dude
You see how I grip that tool
This is what happens when you try to act hard in here like my nipples do
They're like, "Carter's bringing gun lines, really dude."
So I be real with you
Bragging about violence is the dumbest thing ever even if it's something that you really do
So we don't believe this gangster facade
We just know that it isn't true
On one hand that makes me really mad
On the other hand, I really wanna tickle you
Yeah, that's tickle bars
In the door of my refrigerator, that's where my pickles are
Psych! There's only juice in those pickle jars!
You about to get picked apart
I'll start tickling you if you leave your armpits ajar
I'm a bad boy, I left three boogers underneath the driver seat of a rental car
Have you ever been tickled when you're sitting in a bathtub?
Has someone ever tickled you cause they were tricking you
And said they were gonna give you a back rub?
I've had both those things happen to me
And I don't even consider it bad luck
Yes I'm extremely ticklish but Carter Deems is just that tough!
Tiiiiiime
[Round 1: Isaac Knox]
Yo, I can't stand his delivery
Always sounds like he has trouble speaking
And all those shout outs proved that you stumble reading
So what will a missile do?
When a Sierra Mist will do?
But you missed a whole Mountain
I'm telling you you missed the Dew
Now, he had some verses meant for Lavos until that rescinded
And I said, "Sure I'll rep Orlando in Atlanta limits"
I deserve a veteran match, not a rapping gimmick
However, this is my 32nd battle so I'll have him in it
Now if Uno Lavos means One Voice, I'm an acquired taste
Mind's in a higher space, I wish you would/wood, climb in a fire place
If Uno's dumped me, you should've called out his commitment
I would've probably warned that he cancelled against good competition like he's Jonny Storm
But I'm not here to battle Storm for ya
I've been the best in Florida
So I don't need to warm it just to outshine this Georgia brav
I play my music from the south to California and north of us
So Carter Deems, I've been dropping CD's when I tour (tore) it up
See, I spit bars that pop and hit hard as cops
Until he light headed like Pixar mascot
Your twig arms can not be minnier or skinnier
If a girl asks for your body type, the answer is linear
So he's got a pick up line, but he fails with it
Having thee frail image of a female gymnast
He goes on Craigslist, miss connections to be e-mailed digits
But that ship has sailed like the on-line retail business
But forget this geek's frail, women's frame
England came
But it's not Carter Deems this card redeems I'll win a claim
Entertain and use the English Channels as a swimming lane
Bring the flame and blow up in Atlanta
'96 Olympic games
[Round 2: Carter Deems]
You're just a big silly man
Trying to style on me, that's silly man
In her entire life, your mom's only owned two mini vans
My parent's have 8 Chevy Venturas...that's too many vans
So many rides for the family my driveway look like Disneyland
That's bars and I'm about to drop some more ...
That's bars, that's BAR
And I'm about to drop more heat like bombs away
Boring white guy about to cook food, look dude I'm Bobby Flay
Give me some carrots and I'll chop away
Cooking more than my mom on the holidays
Punches flying but I'm not fighting
I'm over the beef like hollandaise
I'm not a fighter, but your face makes me want to box away
I have a first edition Chewbacca that's worthless cause I threw the box away
Your first round was so good I wish you'd rewrap it like Boxing Day
I'm not a fighter but I have a cat named Tina and she really wants to box today
She hit quick with the paws, every punch is andale
Wait, that's not what I'm trying to say
She hit quick then she pause, that last punch is on delay
To be honest I'm just trying to get on Bad Bars and that last bar, I'm on my way
One time I accidentally walked into a rated R movie and I saw a lady wearing lingerie
I talk to girls a lot, they usually say, "This is not a date"
This fruit in my pocket is a fig, it is not a date
I'll hit him with so many punches it'll make his body ache
Have him jumping around like he need a potty break
I'm about to drop some (mouths words)​ so hard it'll make the potty break
My body odor is so strong it'll easily overcome your body spray
Cause when I raise them arms, this is where my B.O. be like Bobby Ray
You reach so much, you reach more than yoga
You should end each line with "namaste"
My parents tried to kick me out the basement but I was like
"Nah, I'mma stay"
Besides, why would I leave?
My mom owns two microwaves
I can cook two Lean Cuisines
At the same exact time of day
And that makes me feel some type of way
You're like Comic Sans in human form
We couldn't give your type away
Talking bad about me on MySpace, go ahead man, type away
But you're lagging behind like a time delay
I'm running out of rhymes to say
Sonnie will you please call "time" today?
[Round 3: Carter Deems]
You push buttons on the microwave cause you like the way that numbers look
Yet somehow your Lean Cuisine always comes out under cooked
This isn't a battle, this is a beast talking to a little boy, but it ain't Jungle Book
I'm not sure if I'd be able to run faster or slower if I grew another foot
I really like him
How do I diss somebody that is my friend?
Do I say that you're just average like 5'10" ?
Or that I'm way better at Skyrim?
Or do I get violent, say I'm gonna do his arm dirty and sign his cast with a Tide pen?
Or do I tie it in with how you're gonna get hit harder than a tight end
Or do it just say-actually I just wish that your jeans were so skinny that it makes your iPhone 5 bend
I have a couch in my house and I really want to cuddle there
I've asked 15 girls but all I get are big no's (nose) like Double Dare
Still I'm on a streak like the ones found in my underwear
I really need another pair
Boxers so nasty I have to burn stains (Berenstain) like Brother Bear
Cold as an Artic pop, tough as an Otter Box
Carter known to pull up and kick it like soccer socks
I got birds following behind me like Oswald Cobblepot
Your money coming up short like halter tops
I'm on top of the paper, Carter all over green like Roger Klotz
Before I die I really want to pet an ocelot
Like, I want to do that, a lot a lot
I would rank you hot on Hot Or Not
Cause you're classy like a pocket watch
I'll cut holes in your blue jeans and make your pocket's watch
I'm real dude, I'm about to touch your pocket...watch
I would never backhand you, but if we play tennis you gonna see what my backhand do
Shots precise but sometimes I lose control like Fatman Scoop
Sometimes I lose control and have to take a trashcan poop
I can do a toe touch, my cat can too
When I ball, it's like you took a trip to Nepal you gonna see what this cat man do (Kathmandu)
I'm riding shotgun but I never have to pop the pump
I'm balling out and reboxing dunks 'til I pop the pump
Now my pockets looking like big poppa pump
I'm balling out like I blocked a punt
When I get sad I look at pictures of cats driving monster trucks
How many pairs of Sketchers do you own?
Answer me!!
That's not enough