There's something wrong, I'm not getting it on
And I'm definitely not getting off
The only action that I've seen in three months
Was when the doctor said, "Turn your head and cough"

Erection, erection
It's hard
Erection, erection
Oh God

The best I've done of late in getting some ass
Was sitting on the Amoco toilet seat
My little problem isn't going away
No matter how fast or how often I beat

Erection, erection
It's hard
Erection, erection
Oh God

Get me off now

I almost got a little pussy last week
Cleaning the litter box in my living room
My palms are hairy and my balls are blue
I need some action, and I need it real soon
Erection, erection
It's hard
Erection, erection
Oh God

Erection, erection [x3]

Erection
Somebody please get these poor rocks off