[PETER]
Me and Jesus
Come and hug and squeeze us
'Cause you know that
He's a simply Christ-errific dude
His eyes are blueish
Bright and I-love-you-ish
And he's also Jewish
But he's not the least bit rude

[JESUS]
Peter, my boy

[PETER]
Yes?

[JESUS]
You're sweet as chocolate cake

[PETER]
You bring me joy
And so I won't forsake you
Like the gays do

[PETER, PETER & JESUS]
Me and Jesus
What a happy pair
Together, we're hotter than walking on water
We walk on air
[PETER, spoken]
You're a real pal, Jesus

[JESUS, spoken]
Well, I'll tеll you this, Peter
You ain't nevеr had a friend like me

[PETER, sung]
Me and Jesus

[JESUS]
Those are words that please us

[PETER]
'Cause we're close as Beezus
And Ramona Quimby are

[JESUS]
My life is sweeter
With my new friend Peter

[PETER]
You're a lotus eater
Now that you're a superstar

[JESUS]
It used to be
I always took the brunt
[PETER]
But now you're free
And Bush is bombing countries

[JESUS]
'Cause I like it

[PETER, PETER & JESUS, JESUS]
Me and Jesus
Friends until we die
Again?
Together forever and ever
We never will say goodbye