[Verse 1: Bowen Yang, Lady Gaga]
It's late in the evening
She's wondering what clothes to wear
So I put on my make-up
And I brush my long blonde hair

[Chorus: Bowen, Bowen & Gaga]
And then she asks me
"Do I look alright?"
And I say "Yes"
"You look wonderful tonight"

[Verse 2: Bowen, Gaga]
It's later that evening
And we're wasted in Times Square
So I eat a full Big Mac
And I shave off my body hair

[Chorus: Bowen, Bowen & Gaga]
And then she bites me
And both my nipples left and right
And I said "Bitch"
"You look wonderful tonight"

[Bridge: Bowen & Gaga]
I feel wonderful because I see the love light in your eyes
And the beauty of it all is that you just don't realizе
Italians aren't white
[Verse 3: Bowen, Gaga]
We go to a party
And еveryone screams at me
'Cause it's a five year old's party
And I'm smoking PCP

[Chorus: Bowen & Gaga, Bowen]
I eat the whole birthday cake
While all the children cry
I shout "Goddamn"
"I feel wonderful tonight"