Frank Loesser
If I Were a Bell
[SARAH, spoken]
Ask me how do I feel

[SARAH]
Ask me now that we're cozy and clinging
Well, sir, all I can say is
If I were a bell I'd be ringing
From the moment we kissed tonight
That's the way I've just got to behave
Boy, if I were a lamp I'd light
And if I were a banner I'd wave

Ask me how do I feel
Little me with my quiet upbringing
Well, sir, all I can say is
If I were a gate I'd be swinging
And if I were a watch I'd start
Popping my spring
Or if I were a bell I'd go
Ding, dong, ding, dong, ding

Ask me how do I feel
From this chemistry lesson I'm learning
Well, sir, all I can say is
If I were a bridge I'd be burning
Yes, I knew my morale would crack
From the wonderful way that you looked
Boy, if I were a duck I'd quack
And if I were a goose I'd be cooked
Ask me how do I feel
Ask me now that we're fondly caressing
Pal, if I were a salad
I know I'd be splashing my dressing
Ask me how to describe
This whole beautiful thing
Well, if I were a bell I'd go
Ding, dong, ding, dong, ding!